ASIAN MENTAL HEALTH BLOG
Writing on Asian identity, family dynamics, and the work of becoming yourself.
Honest, specific, and written for 1.5 and 2nd generation Asian immigrants who are done with generic advice.
I write about the things my clients bring into sessions. The guilt that surfaces when you try to want something different. The anger that has been building for years without a name. The family dynamics that shaped you before you knew they were shaping you.
The topics are specific because the experiences are specific. If you have ever felt like mainstream mental health content was not really written for you, you are probably right. This is.
Asian Perfectionism: Why You Feel the Pressure to Be Perfect (and How to Heal)
Many Asian Canadians struggle with perfectionism, people-pleasing, and never feeling “good enough.” This article explores the cultural, family, and emotional roots of perfectionism—and how to begin healing from it.
5 Hidden Costs of Ending Intergenerational Trauma in Asian Families (No One Talks About This)
Being the first person in your family to address intergenerational trauma is both transformative and deeply painful. This article explores the hidden emotional costs of change, including blame, shame, misunderstanding, and relational tension, and why healing often disrupts family systems before it creates lasting change.
Turning Red and Intergenerational Trauma: What the Film Gets Right About Asian Family Dynamics
Turning Red offers a powerful portrayal of emotional inheritance and mother daughter dynamics in Asian families. This explores what the film gets right and what it simplifies about intergenerational trauma, emotional suppression, and the slow process of change across generations.
Asian Mental Health Stigma Is Real But Racism Plays a Bigger Role
Mental health stigma in Asian communities is often blamed for everything. This post challenges that narrative by exploring how racism and structural oppression shape mental health in deeper ways.
4 Warning Signs Your Therapist Doesn’t Understand Your Culture
Not all therapy is culturally safe, and misunderstandings about identity can significantly impact trust, safety, and outcomes in treatment. This article outlines common signs that a therapist may be relying on stereotypes, oversimplified cultural assumptions, or deficit-based thinking when working with Asian clients. It also explores the complexity of cultural identity and why true cultural competence requires curiosity, flexibility, and an understanding of systemic forces rather than assumptions or generalizations.
The Model Minority Myth: How It Impacts Asian Mental Health, Identity, and Self-Worth
The Model Minority Myth affects more than how Asian communities are viewed. It can shape our identity, self-worth, perfectionism, and mental health. Learn how this stereotype impacts Asian Canadians and how to define yourself beyond achievement.
Asian Identity in Canada: Why There Is No “Right Way” to Be Asian
Many Asian Canadians grow up feeling pressure to define their identity through external expectations such as cultural authenticity or assimilation. This post explores how identity is shaped by personal experience, systemic racism, and cultural expectations, and why there is no single correct way to be Asian.
FOB vs Banana Labels: Why Asian Identity Is More Complex Than Either Category
Identity labels like FOB and “banana” force a false binary on Asian identity that does not reflect lived experience. Many second generation Asians exist in between and beyond these categories, and real psychological health comes from moving past external labels toward a more flexible and self defined sense of identity.
Anti-Black Racism in Asian Communities: Why It Matters for Your Own Healing
Many Asian Canadians grow up disconnected from the history of racism. This post explores how anti-Black racism and internalized racism are connected, and why understanding both is essential for healing and self-awareness.
How Asian Canadians Navigate Racism, Privilege, and Solidarity
Asian Canadians often navigate both racism and privilege in complex ways. This explores how understanding these experiences can deepen empathy, identity, and connection across communities.
What Internalized Racism Looks Like for Asian Canadians And How to Heal It
Internalized racism can quietly shape how you see yourself and others. This explores how it shows up in everyday thoughts, and how reflection can help you begin to heal.
How Perfectionism and Fear Make You Productive but Not Fulfilled
You can be productive, efficient, and still feel unfulfilled. This explores how perfectionism, fear, and cultural pressure can keep you busy but disconnected from what actually matters.
Why Authenticity Matters in Therapy And How It Helps You Open Up
A behind-the-scenes look at how authenticity in therapy builds trust, deepens conversations, and helps clients feel safe enough to truly open up.
How to Talk About Racism in Therapy Without Feeling Stuck or Powerless
Understanding racism can be validating—but it can also leave you feeling stuck. This article explores how to acknowledge structural racism while still focusing on your own healing, growth, and sense of control.
Why It Feels So Hard to Spend Money on Yourself as an Asian Immigrant or Second Generation Adult
Many second generation Asian immigrants struggle with spending money on themselves, even when financially stable. This article explores how scarcity mindset, cultural guilt, and early family conditioning shape emotional patterns around money and self worth.
What Your Fantasies Reveal About Trauma, Identity, and Emotional Healing in Asian diaspora
Your inner fantasies are not random. They often reflect unmet emotional needs, identity formation, and early relational experiences. This article explores how imagination can reveal patterns of trauma, masculinity, and healing across different stages of emotional development.
10 Mental Health Strategies for Surviving Family Gatherings When You Dread the Holidays
Family gatherings can be emotionally complex, especially when relationships are strained. This practical guide offers strategies for navigating holidays with more safety and intention, including boundary setting, exit plans, emotional preparation, and ways to protect your mental health while staying connected on your own terms.
The Lonely Marathon: A Poem About Loneliness, Connection, and Emotional Survival
A reflective poem exploring loneliness, emotional endurance, and the quiet shared experience of human suffering. It moves through isolation and self perception toward the realization that emotional pain is often shared rather than solitary.
Everything Everywhere All at Once and the Immigrant Parent Child Relationship: Exploring Cultural Expectations and Family Dynamics
Everything Everywhere All at Once highlights many themes familiar to children of immigrants, including family expectations, cultural differences, sacrifice, and identity. I was featured in this VeryWell Mind article, where I share my perspective on immigrant parent-child relationships and the mental health experiences that shape Asian families.
Asian Immigrant Mental Health: Understanding Shame, Filial Piety, and Intergenerational Trauma
Asian immigrant mental health is shaped by more than individual experiences. In this panel discussion, Harry Au explores intergenerational trauma, shame, filial piety, family expectations, and the experiences that influence mental health in Asian communities